For Thanksgiving, my immediate family of six traveled a bit over 400 miles to visit our extended family and spend four gloriously fun-filled days stuffing our faces, avoiding politics, and getting approximately four hours less sleep each night than we typically need to properly function.

On the way there, I utilized half of the six-hour drive in which I was captive in a passenger seat to listen to Tom Lake on Audible (shout out to Jillian Stacia for the rec, I loved it) and the other half with my planner open, jotting down Christmas gift ideas, tallying up estimated costs, and stressing out about potential menu possibilities — because I am hosting my in-laws for Christmas — all while trying not to get car sick.

When we arrived at my brother’s house and unloaded our bags, the cousins all hugged then immediately ran off — the younger ones to play and the other ones to decide on plans for the evening. From a small cooler in the trunk, I pulled out a cheeseball.

“You already made it?” my sister-in-law laughed.

“Yes,” I smiled, holding a saran-wrapped ball of deliciousness that traveled over three state lines. I shrugged a shoulder and said, “It tastes best when the flavors can marry.” I know I could have mixed the ingredients together an hour before serving it and it still would have been destroyed. But it is better if you can make it ahead.

The next day, on Thanksgiving, my sister floated through her kitchen roasting brussel sprouts and sweet potatoes. Her husband carved the turkey. My sister-in-law set out desserts and twelve cousins, ages four to eighteen played Hide-and-go-Seek. I unwrapped the cheese ball, plated it with two types of crackers, and within minutes, kids and adults alike started to dig in.

“I love this stuff,” one cousin said.

“Why is it so good?” another one asked.

Within minutes, it was no longer a ball, more like a glob stabbed to death with an appetizer knife. And nothing could have made me more happy — I love it when people love my food.

I grew up eating this cheeseball during the holidays. My mother made it because it was festive — the meat red, the scallions green. But I make it all year round. Friends coming over? Cheeseball. Potluck? Cheeseball. Girls night, book club, summer barbeque? Cheeseball, cheeseball, cheeseball.

It’s the type of dish that a small group from any gathering always hovers around, or comes back to, or unabashedly demolishes and says something like, “I cannot stop eating this” — and mean it sincerely — with an embarrassed laugh and a hand up to their face because a cracker is half hanging out of their mouth.

I made this cheeseball in late October, about a month ago, when fifteen Exhale women gathered together in Northern Virginia for an evening of food and friendship and creative connection. This is where I got the recommendation for Tom Lake, where two women planted themselves next to the cheeseball, munching and talking, saying ‘We just can’t stop eating it!’ and where I’d told everyone there that this recipe would be in the forthcoming Coffee + Crumbs book.

Except in the following weeks, the essay about the cheeseball wasn’t working. I had too many ideas, and then I’d edit and was sure it wasn’t enough. I wanted to write about how easy it was to make and about how much people love it. How meaningful it is to take something simple, that was passed down to you, and offer it to people you care about. I wanted to incorporate how it holds the memory of my mom, but I couldn’t think of one specific time we made it or ate it together, even though I know we did. The writing was painful. The words were strained. Nothing seemed right and the whole process felt way too hard. After much angst, I pivoted — and wrote something else.

But I still wanted to offer the recipe to the women of Exhale. And what better time than during what I feel could be a collective Early December Holiday Pre-Panic. Are you hosting? Traveling to family? Have three holiday work/neighborhood/friend parties to attend? No matter what you have on your planner for the coming month, no matter what creative pursuits you're holding onto or pausing for a time — I want to offer all of us an easy win.

Don’t overthink it: make the cheeseball. I promise everyone will love it.

Violet’s Cheeseball

INGREDIENTS

Two 8 oz. blocks of cream cheese, softened
A half bunch of scallions, cut in small diagonals into the green
One package of dried beef (found by the packages of kielbasa and packaged meats)
Optional: ground walnuts

TO MAKE

Leave the cream cheese on the counter until it’s soft. Cut the scallions up. Cut the dried beef into small diamonds or squares. Put it all in a bowl and either use your hands, a spatula, or mixer to blend the ingredients. (I use my hands.) Scoop it up and plop it onto saran wrap. Shape it into a ball then wrap it up. Place in the fridge for at least a few hours but ideally, 2-3 days ahead.

Before serving, I like to cover the ball in ground walnuts. (Totally optional.)

Serve with crackers. (I’ve tried all sorts of combinations but like original Triscuits and Wheat Thins best.) That’s it! Enjoy!